Photos

Tonight was like one long 'your mom' joke, but one of the best involved a discussion of an enormous carrot I had once come across. The carrot was so large and...uh, 'interesting' looking, that I took some pictures of it.

Ironhide: Did you take many photos of it?
Me: Yeah, I took about ten photos of it, then I ate it.
Bluestreak: I took about ten photos of your mum, then I ate her.

"To do" list

I think we all know where this one is going:

and no, I didn't write that on there!

Freelancer

Re: Sister's Post

Your mum hires in freelance binmen.

I hosed down your mum with fluid from a backpack sprayer.

and

The heavy machinery I used on your mum left a bit of a mess in one area of the park.

Dirty Lego

On the subject of knock-off Lego products:

me: It will get into the good Lego and contaminate the gene pool.

Mothra: XDDD

your mom got into te good lego

and contaiminated the gene pool

me: I contaminated yo mom's jeans!

Mothra: omg

Dirty Mom

River Fish Person
6:05 PM
this whole conversation just needs to start over and be less dirty
6:05 PM
oh wait
6:05 PM
its all my fault
6:05 PM
what am i saying

Trailbreaker
6:05 PM
lulz
6:05 PM
it needs to be more dirty!

River Fish Person
6:06 PM
your mom needs to be more dirty
6:06 PM
dude
6:10 PM
*throws dirt on conversation*

Trailbreaker
6:11 PM
YEAH
6:11 PM
LULZ
6:11 PM
Threw dirt on your mom

River Fish Person
6:11 PM
XD
6:11 PM
ahhahaha

Trailbreaker
6:12 PM
When she died and was burried

River Fish Person
6:12 PM
.......
6:12 PM
omg

Trailbreaker
6:12 PM
lulz

On the subject of a delicious Wendy's Frosty:

Convenient Station:
yeah, after mentioning it last night. i was craving it
i had to have it
and i did
and oh was it good....

Me:
Your mom had to have it
and did
and oh was it good...

The Paint

The following conversation between 'Trailbreaker' and Humanoid Karbon Unit 017 after 'Trailbreaker' had done some painting.


'Trailbreaker': Bro, I've got paint in my hair
'Humanoid Karbon Unit 017': gay gay gay gay! GET THAT OUT OF THERE!
'Trailbreaker': .... That's what he said!

The ethanol

At work I poured some used 70% ethanol back into an absolute ethanol jug for storage...of course being a dutiful lab member I altered the label to reflect the changed contents and indicate the owner of the liquid. Labmate 'Bluestreak' encountered the jug later that evening and altered the label further, to reflect something completely uncalled for:


I only happened to notice it when I was cleaning the jug out for recycling. YES, this is where the blog name comes from!

The shirt

Birthday present from 'Huffer.' I actually like the front better, but only the back is applicable to this blog.


The white text glows in the dark. LIEK WHOA.

The Dungeon

Last night while playing World of Warcraft, me and a few people were going through the Wailing Caverns, a dungeon. The group leader was particularly gung-ho, mostly about him being a hotshot, so he was easy to troll. He said something along the lines of "When you finish we can go back to the beginning and do it again" to which I instinctively replied "That's what she said!"
Lulz were obtained.
Later on a couple of us were lagging behind. Gung-ho guy innocently asked "what're you guys doing back there?" and of course our reply was "Your mum."

The cup

My bro, our friend 'Trailbreaker' and I were driving to visit the Air Force base museum, and stopped for lunch at Taco Hell. After eating it was my turn to drive, so I got in the driver's seat and tried to position my ginormous plastic cup of ice tea in the cup holder. The cup holder is just in front of the shift stick, so one must be careful when putting a large cup in there (LOL). As I observe the large cup of ice tea, which I plan to consume, I comment to my car-mates: "Look at the size of this thing compared to the size of my torso! If that's all gonna fit in here, I feel like there is going to have to be some kind of physiological change."

Bro just looks at me for a second, with that 'you KNOW what I'm about to say' look. I don't know. So he as to say it.

"That's what she said."

The costume

At the end of dog training class, trainer lady will tell us weird semi-related-to-the-topic-of-dog-training stuff. My friend 'Mirage' and I kind of zone out because its usually not all that fascinating. Trainer is talking about some charity event where a costume is involved. I perk up at the idea of a costume, but it soon becomes evident that only one person would be actually wearing the costume, a staff member. I turn to Mirage and whisper "but *I* wanted to wear the costume!" to which she replied "that's what she said." ZOMG

...

That's a lot funnier when you are sitting there bored, I suppose XD

Intro

Great moments in "your mom" and "that's what she said" history. Well, maybe not great, more like semi-amusing to amusing.